How can I write my simple text better? Number 2

Question

I'm learning a lot by having you guys correct my stupid texts. Thanks a lot! I wanted to do it again, so here we go:

Text:

我的工作室程序员，我知道java很好。
我想想会是警察，这样我学习学习的。
我学习韩语因为汉语学习是我的爱好。
谢谢你们因为你们看了我的写作。

What i wanted to say:

My job is programming, i know well java. I want very much to be a police officer, so I study very much. I study chinese because studying chinese is my hobby. Thank you because you've read my text.

How can I write it better?

Answer 1

我的工作室程序员，- My job is programming

我的工作[是]程序员

室 is a typo, it should be 是(is)

我知道java很好。- I know well java. (I know java well )

我很懂 java

知道(know) generally mean 'aware of' you should use 懂 (know) to express the meaning of 'understand'

我想想会是警察，这样我学习学习的。- I want very much to be a police officer, so I study very much (hard).

我很想當警察，因此很努力学习

'want very much' is not 想想(think about), it is '很想'; 'be a police' is not '是警察', it is '當/做警察'

我学习韩语因为汉语学习是我的爱好。。 - I study Chinese because studying Chinese is my hobby.

我学习(汉)语因为汉语学习是我的爱好。 --> simplify: 我因爱好而学习汉语

'韩' typo

谢谢你们因为你们看了我的写作。- Thank you because you've read my text.

谢谢你们，因为你们看了我的文字。 simplify: 谢谢你们看了我的文字

写作 implies 'creative' writing, you should use '文字'

Answer 2

In the following, I first write my translation in Chinese, and then your translation literally mean, as well as some explanation where needed.

我是程序员。(*My job is a programmer.)

我很懂Java。 (I know that Java is very good. To show the grade of a verb phrase preceded by auxiliaries like 会、懂, adverbs like 很 should be placed pre-verbally. In your sentence, 很好 is the adjective predicate to Java, which as a whole acts as the Object of 知道.)

我非常想成为一名警察，因此很努力地学习。 (?)

我学习汉语是出于爱好。 (grammatically good; there's a typo 韩语. Literally it's 我学习汉语因为学习汉语是我的爱好, but it is not very authentic because of unnecessary redundancy.)

谢谢你们读了我写的文段。 (grammatically good, but rather we use the pivotal construction, where 你们 is simultaneously the Object of 谢谢 and Subject of 读)