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Both 这么 and 那么 mean "so" or "such" (among other meanings). For example:

你这么高,你这个男朋友是不是矮了点儿?

In these contexts, is there any difference if you replace 这么 with 那么?

Also, generally is there any difference between 这么 and 那么, and how can I use it properly?

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  • BTW why is this sentence not "你男朋友" but "你这个男朋友"...? Maybe they are talking while pointing out to a picture...?
    – Blaszard
    Oct 21, 2017 at 3:34
  • basic grammar, e.g. "实用现代汉语语法"指示代词(Demonstrative pronouns) 指示代词中最基本的是表示 指的"这"和表示 指的"那" ,其他指示代词都是由它们派生出来的。按照性质和用法,指示代词可分为几小类:。。。指别或称代(substitution)性质、方式、程度:这么、这样、这么样|那么、那样、那么样
    – user6065
    Oct 21, 2017 at 8:31
  • Does she has another 男朋友, otherwise it is not very polite to addressing someone like this. There is a saying 别跟我这个那个的.
    – sfy
    Oct 21, 2017 at 17:39
  • “这个” indicates an attitude of disapproval or disrespectful in this context. Mar 14, 2022 at 3:25

2 Answers 2

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[这么 + adjective] = [this + adjective] referring to something close by

[那么 + adjective] = [that + adjective] referring to something that is not close by

  • 这么高,means "you are this tall" (talk about here and now)

  • 那么高,means "you are that tall" (talk about a situation not in the present)

For example, the reason you were accepted into the basketball team is because you were that tall

  • 这个男朋友是不是矮了点儿? "Isn't this boyfriend of yours a little bit too short?" (the boyfriend is either right there with them or they are referring him as the object of discussion in front of them)

  • 那个男朋友是不是矮了点儿? "Isn't that boyfriend of yours a little bit too short?" (the boyfriend is not right there with them)

'this tall' and 'that tall' can be replaced by 'so tall'

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  • Thanks. Is 那个你男朋友 an invalid sentence? Should 你 always precedes 那个?
    – Blaszard
    Oct 21, 2017 at 17:45
  • 1
    '你那个(object)' means. 'that (object) of yours ' On the other hand, '那个你' means ' That you' - for example, 三年前的 那个你
    – Tang Ho
    Oct 21, 2017 at 20:32
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I'd say 这么 is more 'closer to you' than 那么.

For example:

你和我关系这么好。

你和他关系那么好。

Compare 你这么高 with 你那么高. 你这么高 sounds that you are standing the viewpoint of your interlocutor, it's like saying 你这么高(or 咱这么高),他能比得了吗?. 你那么高 sounds that you are trying to exclude yourself from your interlocutor, it's like saying 你那么高, 我可比不了。.

你这个男朋友 is referring to this boyfriend, which might imply this is kind of characteristic of his boyfriend.

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