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What is the proper way of saying "if" in Cantonese?

如果、假如、若 is the most common phrases to express "if" conditions. 若果..? i have never used it. 若然 ... This phrase express a affirmative context instead of if condition. BUT it is really rare to ...
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What is the man saying in this Cantonese cartoon?

You are correct 咪嘈(don't be noisy) means "be quiet!" Master Q was saying "咪嘈呀!" 呀 is a final particle that conveys different emotions, and manners or simply emphasizes the sentence ...
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What do people in Hong Kong say when you are approaching a counter to buy something?

Most likely a contraction of "下一位" (next customer please) 下一位/haa6 jat1 wai6^2/ --> 下~位/haat1 wai6^2/
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